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Look At Me

by Grace and the Carnivore

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1.
let me start this like a painting let me see where this can go i had a dream last night i followed you through your daily life and at the end of the day you turned around and asked me to leave you alone i always let them burn me and then give it all away i never make them earn me and i can never make them stay i've been floating for a year now made sure i'm not aware but it's all the more real when you're standing in your mother's gown that she wore on her wedding day and you turn around and plead "please, go away" what can i say, i don't play these games the way the painters do i'm a prideful child hiding from the truth
2.
Good Advice 04:36
i set fire to my house while giving good advice to an oil lamp that's spilt and sharing all it's light with my furniture, it's burning, turning the darkness bright you call that a release? instantly unshackled from the things i love but i still feel like the world is a silent judge with the gavel raised and ready to convict me of wanting to be free you didn't stand a chance i leave before the dance has only barely just begun but we had fun you're hoping for a moment of regret that hasn't happened yet and boy, i wouldn't hedge my bets i'm bound to be the one you won't forget used to look into your eyes and see a fire there saw a universe emerge inside your worldly stare but flames burn out and weakness leaves the landscape bare the deed's already done there was never any room for me to make a choice when i heard the passion draining from your tired voice your words had turned from holiness to blackest oil they put me on the run you're hoping for a moment of regret that hasn't happened yet and boy, i wouldn't hedge my bets i'm bound to be the one you won't forget
3.
sometimes i litter in pristine places that's my idea of being bad i'm a night street walker live in streetlamp light take my mornings off and my coffee dark sometimes i like to fight sometimes i push the pusher though i know i'm being bad i'm a bedsheet dweller live in linens white take my clothing off and my humor dark sometimes i bite facing myself was never easy to do why should i try to face you? sometimes i beg for attention that's when i know it's bad i'm your fake phone caller live in vacant fright i take all bets off and my horses dark sometimes i act polite
4.
Tonight 02:59
have i met you, maybe, in a book sometime? or down on the street in another man's line? cuz i've been holding close this bold young guy who's taken my mold and makin me try i'm on the brink of inking a thinking thought on the small of my back just to show off and it's crazy, baby, between the lights a patch of darkness on the streets tonight tonight is something different tonight is something new do you happen to know anyone who looks nothing like you? you're a vision, baby, with your jaw so cut and your jet black hair and your cigarette you could tell me things i wouldn't believe wiping windows with your dirty sleeve in a blink i'm drinking your sinking fear as you whisper softly in my ear in a moment choking without the light darkness heavy and my sheets too white tonight is something different tonight is something new do you happen to know anyone who looks nothing like you?
5.
Collision 04:08
wrote you two a poem on an american flag stole it on the night we got together it's hanging in my room sometimes it keeps me up at night reminds me of a time when i was freer at times i see your body in the stories that i tell the words hang in the air just like a vision i picture you in dresses or in nothing at all hold on to the pieces of that single night collision and we were acting special we were living in a cardboard box we loved when we were kids we found something special but we left it in those late-night talks there's nothing that i miss
6.
Spiraling 01:43
things start spiraling out of control real quickly
7.
your body's not the shell that i've been looking for forget i ever tried to make you keep me warm i'm not some lonely girl who needs her father's care so why am i looking for a daddy in that long, shaggy hair? just cut me loose what's my excuse why can't i walk away you look a little wilder than the wild in me full of fearful nonchalance, but so much more naive don't know what i've been needing, lust without a price i don't know why i thought i'd find it in some fast and full-grown child just cut me loose what's my excuse why can't i walk away i am not a parasite i am not your ghost i am done not being wanted oh, i want to be haunted i am a worthy host just cut me loose what's my excuse why can't i walk away
8.
you live in a house that's completely your own from your door to your couch to your kitchen stove and the house screams you at a cowering me you leave so little room for another to be i walk from place to place under a cloud of your rain push myself away so i can comfort your pain in a house that's too small, and a house that's too tight someday i'll smash the roof growing up with all my might and i love you, you smother me i hate you, you cover me, enough, you, you're all i see i love you so discover me you live in a world where you'll always have your way i may be a shallow girl but i'll take the highway you're a train charging on, if i was tied to the tracks you'd plow right on through me without ever looking back there are reasons we can't sleep, we're alike, you and i constantly charging to reach the other side but at least i'm out here, at least i'm on my own at least i'm not your passenger or stuck inside your home
9.
Look At Me 04:42
i've been facing demons that i didn't know i had i've been dragged kicking and screaming, but i finally faced the facts i'm insanity inducing, i'm an insult, i'm a thorn i've been eating out my insides since the day that i was born i'm a daze, i'm a maze, i'm a skeleton song i've been searching for some flesh and blood my whole life long i've been painting portraits since before i could speak and i've been telling everyone to look at me i used to dream of childhood i had no longing to be good it's no burden to be so free but time is not a landscape and i've realized there is no escape i'm only facing me oh, this is my looking glass oh, this is what i possess oh this is how i undress oh, this is my holiness i've been facing demons, and they're facing me right back i've been holding on to dreams in which i fill in all my gaps i've been painting portraits since before i could speak and i've been telling everyone to look at me oh, this is my looking glass oh, this is what i possess oh this is how i undress oh, this is my holiness

about

recorded april-july 2015

credits

released July 21, 2015

all songs by john, grace and robert carney
produced/mixed/mastered by THE bradford krieger
engineered by THE chaimes parker
recorded at Hanging Horse Studio in Norwood, MA



bass sounds by john margaris and bradford krieger
guitar sounds by alex fatato
vocals by grace carney
other guitar sounds and keyboards by john carney
drums by robert carney
strings by allyn mccourt, b. kim, and robert cross

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Grace and the Carnivore Boston, Massachusetts

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